As a single parent, here’s how to tell your kids you’re seeing someone - Breaking News in Nigeria today 247 | TheWatchNGR


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Thursday, January 2, 2020

As a single parent, here’s how to tell your kids you’re seeing someone

As a single parent, here’s how to tell your kids you’re seeing someone, single parents

By Eric Patrick

After separation from your partner, it can be liberating to feel that you’re ready to date again.

Most single parents find it hard to try another relationship because they don't really know how to bring their child or children into the picture.

If you have a child or children especially young ones, it’s important to approach the subject delicately with them so you’re careful with their feelings.

The number of children raised in a single-parent household has risen slightly from 2001 to 2016, with 19.2 per cent of children aged 0-14 living with one guardian according to experts.

With so many raising children on their own, it is nice to speak to your kids before you even go on a first date, explaining that you’re ready to get back out there and telling them you can't continue to remain single that you need a partner.

“That way you know what the kids are thinking and feeling,” depending on their age. Teens may expect their parents to be out dating, while those under 12 may feel differently.

“They probably have this affinity to their real parents, and are they still wanting to have their parents get back together? What stage are they at?” questions singles parents must also know..

Having that talk with them first will help you determine their feelings and so you can communicate with them about their expectations.

Whenever you’re ready to introduce a new partner

Tell your kids about a new relationship when you and your partner are ready for a real commitment or you know they will be a stable person in your life, avoid bringing different faces to introduce to your kids.

Dating only casually is fine, but if this is the case, you should keep it out of sight for your children, as they may wonder how frequent any new partners will be in their lives.

You and your new partner should have a conversation on expectations for when they interact with the kids.

“Sometimes new partners make the mistake of playing a ‘daddy’ role or ‘mommy’ role…assuming their partner wants them to take that role.

“It’s even more complicated if that person has their own set of children.”

Don’t force both sets of kids to play together, or to become best friends let the love grow in them.

If your children are very young, introduce them slowly at structured events like barbecues and gradually increase the frequency of them being around the family.

It’s also fine to refer to the partner as a new “friend” if they are very young, and always ask your kids how they feel about you seeing them.

“You have to be really mindful of how they are reacting and always remind them that you love them and that the new partner won’t take away from the time you spend with them.

Also, try to develop a strong relationship between your kids and your new partner, make your kids be free with your partner at all times.
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